The other day Karli and I took a break from homework, went and got burritos, and then went to Smith Park to enjoy the 50 degree afternoon. Gorgeous day, and we walked the park looking for a tree or something to sit underneath—a good spot to eat lunch. Walking past the picnic tables, we were greeted with shouts of “Karli! Ivor!” It was Andy.
Andy is in my Technology for Writers class, and I also work with Andy in the I-Learn Resource Center. He’s a nice guy, I’ve always liked him. That day he was at the park with his family—wife and five kids (sixth on the way as I was informed by one of the young daughters)—and I thought about how adorable they were, and how happy he looked with his family.
Later Karli and I watched the kids romp around before the whole family got on their bikes and rode home. I kept thinking to myself, Man. That guy has it made. He’s got a wife and kids that love him, and he looked so at peace in the world with his family.
That got me thinking to this blog and that article I posted a week back. A generation ago, guys my age had already achieved those “life milestones” that Andy had: a family. Though not on the campus of BYU-I, younger fathers are a rarity. Young families are a rarity. Society’s current thought is that a family shouldn’t be started too early.
The BYU-I/Mormon environment does a lot to contradict that thought though. Here there are many young married men and women—a lot of them younger than me. I’m not even that old. I’m turning 24 at the end of the year. The part of me that subscribes to the thought of society is still shocked and appalled at how young people here are when they get married. It doesn’t matter how many years I’ve spent here and how many of my friends are married.
But at the same time, would I really be writing this blog if I were married and had kids of my own? Would I still be in this kind of “not ready to grow up” kind of funk? Probably not. I think in the LDS community those life milestones are more emphasized than outside, and really those milestones are important to an individual’s growth and maturity. I guess it’s a coming of age of sorts. I guess the formula can be broken down into the following:
Wife+kids+Job+House= Grown up
And of course the opposite result of that is “not grown up.”
I think my generation of young men may want these things, but not yet, or are denied them because of a myriad of reasons. For myself I want a family and all that, but not yet. If the right girl comes along then things might have to roll. But I think becasue there is no pressure to start a family, then I have no pressure to grow up. (Other than graduating haha...)
Why are these things considered life milestones? Discuss here.